Days that change your life

I couldn't in good conscience let the previous week pass without note.

On Friday, may day was interrupted by 'one of those phone calls you don't want'. Janet called me to let me know that Steve Francis had suddenly passed away. He was a few months younger than me and had followed me through school, drama, youth clubs and the like. He worked a few minutes walk from me -right now I wish that I had taken the opportunity to offer him a lift now and then. I remember his grinning face as he tapped me on the back at the train station. I said hi and boarded the train in a seperate carriage to accommodate my bike.

I was reminded this morning in church how important it is to take opportunities to appreciate the people in your life and also how the little things we do in life have a huge impact on people that we never see.

The sadness and shock surrounding Steves passing will dissipate in time, I hope that the importance of taking every opportunity to love people never will.

Good night Steve, I hope you get a good seat for the Gills games from heaven!

Self sabotage.

Things have been tough at work for about 18 months. Since September it has been prgogressivley difficult. Earlier in 2010 I thought I was seeing light at the end of the tunnel, then things went awry, picked up and finally hit an all time low when Kelly had his temper tantrum.

I am gradually realising that as much as things are difficult, I am sabotaging my own chances of success with the way I am thinking. My inner monlogue is focussing on how much confidence I have lost, how unfit I really am, and all the negative things in my life. I know a healthy dose of realism is a good thing, but my mind seems to have gone too far the other way.

Time to get in to the right 'headspace' if I am going in search of Inca gold!

What's this??

I decided to keep a blog of my preparations, mentally, physically and financially as a personal reminder of the journey. At some stage, I will invite my friends and family to have a read, so they too can be part of the journey.

The decision?

So here I am 32 years old, just back from my epic trip to the Great Wall of China and looking for the next trip. I started looking through websites on Monday, picked up a few ideas, but nothing really leapt out as my next adventure in waiting. Roll the clock forward some 24 hours, I'm at the gym for Balance class, looking forward to recounting my adventures to anyone standing still long enough for me to assail them. And that's when inspiration hit! I say inspiration, actually I am sort of piggy backing off someone elses dream. -and apologies Rebecca if you get to read this!

I had been saying for some weeks prior to leaving for China that I would love to do Machu Pichu. My hopes were somewhat dashed when talking to Laura when walking the Great Wall and listening to how tough the trek itself had been. I figured I would never be physically able (due to the altitude) to complete the challenge.

Driving home after class really changed my mind. At this stage, I don't know if in the space of the next 18 months I will be able to raise my fitness level sufficiently to finish. What I do know is I never will if I don't try.

I've not been in a particularly good frame of mind recently, mainly due to circumstances at work. 2 weeks ago my confidence took a major battering, to the point that I really don't want to return to work tomorrow. For me right now, the prospect of walking the Inca trail is not only a physical challenge, but an emotional remedy for the dark times I am feeling in my life.